Yoga Schmoga

I'm sure we're all familiar with the yoga craze. It's really quite popular now. What should be a way to relax, stretch and gain a clearer perspective on your one's life has grown into some kind of monster.

I've been to a few yoga classes, and I could say they were enjoyable. Very relaxing and helped me concentrate. But a religion, it is not.

A friend of mine who agreed to give his opinion only on the condition of anonymity, for fear of reprisals from all those yoga crazies out there, had this to say:
...what's with the yoga craze, all of a sudden? We don't believe
in anything, but we're quite happy to magpie the buzzwords of
the mystics as a way of justifying our egotism? I don't think
so, Bhoddisatva. Also, the drawstring pants and the rolled up
pastel mats are just too precious. I can't put my finger on it,
but they seem to signify something rather insidious somehow.

There are mommy and baby yoga classes now. How silly is that? First of all, infants are way to young to get anything out of a yoga class, so I think we can assume it's for the mom. Now, a new mom who is stressed out and dealing with a new baby, is not going to relax, concentrate on her breathing, and get the full benefits of yoga when she's holding her infant.

One time, at band camp yoga class, we had a substitute yoga teacher that did and said some pretty goofy things. I was a bit taken aback, and almost collapsed into a giggling fit when she asked us to relax our sphincters. I'm not sure if there were other ten-year-olds in the class, but oddly enough, I was the only one laughing. If there had been babies in the room, I would only hope they would participate and do as told.

Then there's all the new "yoga fashions" that are out there. Shouldn't yoga be about focusing on yourself, breathing rhythmically, stretching and not worrying about what others think of your appearance. It is so not about looking like a super model or impressing your fellow classmates. And when you do make it about that, well, it defeats the purpose. It's not even about being good at yoga, it's about going through the processes that give you that warm, mushy, smiley, I just got out of yoga class feeling.

"Some of the positions in yoga can be kind of embarrassing," says studio owner Jodi Brennan of Rochester, N.Y. "I've seen shorts that are too big, but I've also seen the really super-tight ones. That's kind of gross — especially on a guy."

I'm pretty sure this is so not what those Brahmans and Vedic priests had in mind 5,000 years ago when they developed this stuff.