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September 19, 2005

The Real Reason Bush Was So Slow to Respond to Katrina

Some have suggested that racism was the reason the White House was so slow to respond to hurricane Katrina. George Bush doesn't care about black people, right?

Or downright laziness. Our Preznit was on vacation, strumming the gee-tar, schmoozing with his fellators, and couldn't be bothered.

But now friends, the real reason for his anemic dawdling response has now surfaced! Karl Rove was in the hospital with kidney stones. George Bush can't function without his "Brain" telling him what to do. Bush must have been paralyzed. Left holding the My Pet Goat book. Just staring into the headlights completely unable to react without his Handler-in-Chief at his side calling all his shots.

Karl must have been too ill with calcium stones flowing out of his willy to pick up the phone. "Hey, uh Georgy? Ya might wanna do something about the disaster on the Gulf Coast. Or at least, for the love of god pretend that you care. I don't know. Do something. OK, gotta go now, there's a big 'un stuck in my urethra and it's killin' me." Something as simple as that might have gotten him moving in the right direction.

Since Rovey has been in charge of the corporate no-bid contract giveaway program reconstruction effort, Rove has a lot on his mind and is no longer at Bush's side managing the more routine workaday movements of his charge. Thus we have the blunders of having an improperly buttoned shirt on live teevee and being caught on camera writing a note asking about potty protocol in a UN Security Council Meeting.

Yes folks, we may have another installment in the sickening saga of the rich getting richer and poor getting poorer. Halliburton and friends will be cashing in as Bush suspends the Davis-Bacon Act and union workers take a huge pay cut. But at the very least, the exponential growth of Georgy's blunders without Rovey at his side, will provide comical fodder and chortles o'penty for the rest of us.


  • At September 19, 2005, Blogger FantasticAlice said…

    How brilliant and insightful! And in my opinion soooo true too.

    Isn't it funny how he is always indisposed during national catastrophes ie, reading my pet goat to some kids while aircraft went into the twin towers.

    What a yuppie.

  • At September 20, 2005, Blogger Johnny Virgil said…

    It could have been worse. He could have leaned over, forgotten to cover the microphone and said, "Man, i gotta go drain the lizard."


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