Social Security Privatization Soirees

It appears that George Bush's Social Security privatization soirees are not the happenin' events that they used to be.

When the president traveled to Wisconsin last week to tout Social
Security privatization, reporters decided it wasn’t worth their time to
even make the trip. In March, when Bush visited New Mexico for the same
reason, Kiva Auditorium was sparsely attended, with hundreds of empty
seats. In February, Bush went to New Hampshire for a Social Security
event in an airport hangar, only about half of the 2,000 free tickets
were taken and the White House advance team had to scurry to collect
empty chairs before Bush spoke so as to minimize the humiliation.

But if nothing else, maybe these little shindigs could be a good place for our youngsters to find true love.

“Since we can’t ask questions, why schlep over there?” he (a member
of the press corp) reasons. “The White House this morning actually called reporters beforehand, saying: ‘Are you going to be here?’ Later, after they eyeballed the room and found it to be empty, they brought in White House
interns.

“So you had all these fresh young faces — pretty blonde girls, and guys
who haven’t shaved — nodding their approval as the president speaks.”

Perhaps they should institute Ladies Night or nightly drink specials. That will really pack 'em in.