It's Recess-time Somewhere

Proud Member of the Reality-Based Sandbox

August 19, 2005

G'day Mate Sir!

Officials in Australia's parliament have been forced on Friday to rescind
a decision to bar the building's security guards from addressing visitors
as "mate" after the move sparked a nationwide uproar.

Prime Minister John Howard -- who has famously referred to US President
George W. Bush as "mate" -- called the directive handed down Thursday
barring use of the most quintessential of Australian colloquialisms
"absurd and ridiculous".

Also, when referring to animals procreating, the government-approved term will now be "doing it like they do on the Discovery Channel."


  • At August 19, 2005, Anonymous ricky said…

    I doubt the Aussies will stand for that.

    As you may well know, the preferred Aussie slang for procreating is "rooting".

    Which is just very funny. Especially when Australians come to America and, you know, go to a baseball game.

    Sometime around the seventh inning, they get knocked off their seats with the dirtiest song ever, bellowed by 60,000 drunks, and carried on live TV.

    "...for it's root, root, root for the home team..."

    Even little American children stand up and sing it with gusto...

  • At August 19, 2005, Blogger cookie christine said…

    That's too funny! And I guess the reason Penn State hasn't done very well recently is because you aren't rooting hard enough?

  • At August 19, 2005, Blogger John Howard said…

    I would just like to clarify that I have never referred to George Bush as "mate" and don't ever plan to.

  • At August 20, 2005, Blogger sideshow bob said…

    "Mate" absurd and ridiculous? Never! Vegemite, on the other hand....

  • At August 21, 2005, Blogger cookie christine said…

    ok John, or matey, or whatever...

    I don't know.... Some people say if you've seen one John Howard, you've seen them all.

  • At August 21, 2005, Anonymous ricky said…


    I think that's "John Thomas".

    Though, the crazy jelquers might disagree...

  • At August 22, 2005, Blogger cookie christine said…

    thanks a lot, Ricky. I'm googling "John Thomas" and "jelqing" at work. You are going to hell! You know that, right?

  • At August 22, 2005, Anonymous ricky said…

    Cookie! I just did you a favor.

    If anyone asks you why you were googling "jelqing" at work, just tell them you were doing a special project for your boss.

    How much fun is that?


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