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March 06, 2006

Katherine Harris's Busy Weekend

After having a really tough week, with being accused of knowingly taking illegal campaign contributions and then implicated in a nasty bribery scandal, U.S. Republican Senatorial candidate and blue eyeshadow magnate, Katherine Harris has cancelled several of her public appearances and is "hiding."

Harris, who is running for the U.S. Senate, abruptly canceled a stop in
Charlotte County on Saturday, and four other events planned for Lee and
Collier counties were removed from her campaign Web site.

So how, pray tell, do you suppose Ms. Harris spent her weekend? The main stream media is good for some things, but when it comes to engaging in wild speculation, they are consistently and woefully inadequate.

So being the kind and altruistic person that I am, I figured I'd help out and share my thoughts.

1. Full body laser hair-removal?
2. One last sordid passionate weekend with Mitchell Wade before they both go off to separate men's and women's prisons?
3. Getting rid of that toenail fungus problem once and for all?
4. Re-writing the words to Janet Jackson's song 'What Have You Done For Me Lately' to fit her own situation?
5. Corresponding with Fox News in order to get a cushy soft-ball interview that highlights her best assets
6. Toilet Papering Bill Nelson's house?

This is all just rumination of course, so if I left anything out, please let me know.